Published: January 26, 2026
“Imperfection inspires invention, imagination, creativity. It stimulates. The more I feel imperfect, the more I feel alive.” – Author, Jhumpa Lahiri
Perfectionism is something I’ve worked on personally and professionally in the past several years. Just ask my colleagues in Advising, and they will agree that I bring it up more than the average person. I’m certainly not a mental health professional, but occasionally I pick up on perfectionist parts in my students as well.
A quick Google search will show you hundreds of definitions of perfectionism, but my working definition is persistent self-judgment in the pursuit of an ideal. You might be surprised to learn that when I see perfectionism in students, it doesn’t usually signal its arrival with a 4.0 GPA (and it certainly never did for me). Here’s what it actually tends to look like:
- Failed classes
- Worry about procrastination
- Comparison to others
- Anxious/ overwhelmed feelings
- Nothing… no response to outreach
Before we get too gloomy, let’s go ahead and normalize all of this by saying we probably all have some perfectionism in us somewhere, and that’s ok! After all, there are some benefits to it when perfectionism is going well, i.e., producing high-quality work, feeling a sense of accomplishment, or being able to get a lot done. So don’t get down on yourself if you feel like you may have some perfectionism going on. The important piece is how you manage it.
As a non-expert, I have two pieces of advice for managing perfectionism- no matter if your perfectionist parts are loud or quiet:
- Remove the word “should” from your life. “Should” statements almost always leave us feeling judged. Instead of saying to yourself, I “should” be: studying, getting all A’s, eating better, etc. which implies not doing those things is “bad,”… try replacing it with “I’m choosing to” or “I’m choosing not to,” or “I could” or “I will.” This slight change can alleviate some of that self-judgment.
- In my experience, self-compassion is the antidote to perfectionism. Reminding yourself you are a good person, that it’s ok to make mistakes, and that it’s ok if perfectionism rears its perfect little head every so often. The goal is not to get rid of it. The goal is for you to see how fantastic “imperfect” you are!
And if you feel you might benefit from in-depth support, a mental health counselor could be a great option too- I know it was for me. Advising is here to listen and support you as well. Our imperfect moments help us grow, connect, and learn. If any of this feels familiar, know you’re in good company and support is within reach!
