I am not surprised by the recent revelation that Halliburton is overcharging the U.S government for oil its importing from Kuwait to Iraq. That is what happens when a contract is handed out without a bidding process to a subsidiary of a company once run by our vice-president. I am also not surprised that the Miami Dolphins are imploding. That is what happens every year when December rolls around.
The Dolphins have spent the better part of this week thawing out after being stomped by New England last Sunday evening in frigid snow-bound conditions. Jason Taylor said he was still shivering Tuesday, and Jay Fielder has not said a word to anyone since early in the second quarter. Morale is low in Miami. Panic and anxiety have descended on the Dolphins. Fear and loathing is coursing through the team’s clubhouse. Ricky Williams is handing out Paxil to anyone who is interested and coach Dave Wannstedt is checking the classifieds.
The Dolphins, after looking quite virile pistol-whipping the Cowboys on Thanksgiving, are 8-5, and writhing in the soft underbelly of the AFC wild-card race. The problem is that it is December and time for the Dolphins’ annual swoon. The good news for the Dolphins is that they have only one road game remaining. The bad news is that it is in Buffalo, N.Y., a savage place that is barely habitable during the winter months.
This week, the surging Philadelphia Eagles travel to Miami for a Monday night showdown that pits the NFC’s best team against the desperate Dolphins. The Eagles are getting two points and riding an eight game winning streak. Donovan McNabb has continually savaged Rush Limbaugh’s credibility, looking like his old-self working magic with no-name wide-receivers. The Eagles have also benefited from the return of defensive stalwarts and secondary anchors Bobby Taylor and Troy Vincent to the playing field. Their biker gang defense, which has tormented the NFC for several years, is working itself into an amphetamine frenzy just in time for the playoffs.
The Eagles need this game, though not as bad as the Dolphins. The Eagles are battling the St. Louis Rams, a turf-bound band of sallies, for home field in the NFC playoffs. With homefield, I think the Eagles are a good bet to reach the Superbowl. If they lose out to the Rams, they may have to travel to St. Louis and beat the Rams on turf in the NFC championship game. I think the Eagles are the best team in the NFC either way, but there is no doubt the Rams would be helpless on a January afternoon in Philadelphia.
On the other hand, the Dolphins are truly desperate for this game. I don’t like betting against desperate men. It is too hard to judge the bounds of their capabilities. Last week I won big laying on the Broncos to beat the Chiefs. My gambling-addicted Syrian bookkeeper insisted that the Chiefs’ loss to the Bengals and the spread-covering scare against the lowly Chargers would quell their latent complacency and propel them to victory against the Broncos. I knew better. A team that needs to win will usually beat a team that would like to win. It is only natural for an 11-1 team headed to the playoffs to allow complacency to creep in, and it did. Clinton Portis torched the Chiefs and the Broncos are alive and kicking. Now, the Broncos and Dolphins are both sitting at 8-5 with the fiesty Bengals one game back at 7-6. I am conceding the first wild-card spot to the Titans, leaving one spot, which I think will be taken by the Broncos.
However, I am a little nervous about this week, and I’ll tell you why. The Eagles, as I have said, have won eight straight games consistently covering every spread the boys in Vegas have thrown at them. It seems, at least ostensibly, that they are due to lose a game. Plus, it would actually be more fitting for the Dolphins to beat the Eagles, briefly reviving excitement and hope for their vapid fans, then lose at Buffalo and miss the playoffs at the hands of Chad Pennington and the Jets, who they play on the season’s final Sunday.
I am nervous, but not stupid. I’ll take Eagles and the two points and sit back and wait for a Patriots vs. Eagles superbowl.